Vacation World

The teams move from fairly-accessible Bavaria, Germany to a little-known country near Russia, Azerbaijan (a place that Team Big Brother thinks is in Africa—go figure).

Team Border Patrol won yet again last week, so they depart Bavaria first. The rest of the teams are right on their heels, and by the time the teams all land in Baku, Azerbaijan, they’re all neck-and-neck. In one of the coolest experiences I’ve seen on this show, the contestants dance an Azerbaijani dance in what appears to be an ancient temple, surrounded by billowing pillars of fire.

Next morning, they all run inside the temple to grab their next clue. All the teams are offered Fast Forwards, but only the Army Couple and the New York guys choose to attempt the challenge. They have to take 150 hay bales from a huge truck and stack them in a specific formation. The Army Couple is faster, so they get to skip all the rest of the challenges, and advance to the next pit stop and steal first place. Meanwhile, Team New York has to return to the start and complete all of the challenges—with a considerable time disadvantage.

The teams that don’t choose the Fast Forward have to complete one of the creepiest challenges ever designed on this show. Apparently, in Azerbaijan, helicopter pilots have to perform a water test where they’re submerged in a simulated helicopter as it flips over in a pool of water. Then, they have to kick the windows out of the simulator, and swim to the surface. The contestants have to do the same to receive their next clues.

None of the contestants seem to have many difficulties with this challenge, and move swiftly onto their next challenges, much to the New Yorkers’ chagrin. The teams choose to either search through thousands of apples stored in the backseat and trunk of an old car in order to find a specific one in order to get their next clue. The other option is to wash oil from a hairy man who has bathed in it—apparently a medicinal treatment in Azerbaijan.

Again, these challenges don’t offer many difficulties for the teams, and they breeze through them. The Border Patrol manages to finish second, followed by the Kentuckians, Bopper and Mark, who have made tons of the progress. Although the New Yorkers finish the apple challenge quickly, they aren’t quick enough, and their quest for the Fast Forward proves to be the end of their time on the show.

This week, the contestants travel to Bavaria, Germany, a place in Germany, obviously, that Rachel from the Big Brother team thinks is Bolivia. Confused much? She also says “I don’t even know what a beard is,” but is dating a PhD student. Their relationship—and her reason and preparedness for this show—is becoming more and more strange to viewers.

The Border Patrol agents are miles ahead of everybody else in taking the 10-hour train from Turin, Italy to Bavaria. Once they reach Bavaria, they find a little Gasthof full of Bavarian guys with long beards wearing lederhosen and some yodelers. They are given the choice to either style the men’s beards in distinctly German fashion, or to travel to another location where they are to build gingerbread houses from pieces of gingerbread they collect on a path.

After teams complete one of these two challenges, they are sent to “Cinderella’s Castle,” or Neuschwanstein, where they are supposed to find King Ludwig II’s bedroom to receive their next clue. Unfortunately for them, there are two castles near each other, and many of the teams head to the wrong one to start.

When they eventually find the clue, they are sent to an ice curling rink where they have to hurl the Travelocity gnomes they picked up at the Gasthof to the center of a red-and-blue bull’s eye on the ice. For some teams, this proves to be nothing at all, but for Federal Agents and the Southern cousins, this challenge takes a maddeningly long time.

In the end, the Border Patrol wins their third leg in a row, and win another trip—this time to Kaosomai, Thailand. Also safe for this leg are Bopper and Mark, who lost the last leg of the race and were trailing everyone in this leg, were able to pass up both the Federal Agents and the Southern cousins at the curling race to come in at sixth place. These two are definitely fan favorites.

The Federal Agents and the Southern cousins fight it out until the very end. The Southern cousins finish the curling challenge first, but then get lost on their way to the final pit stop—in a 200-year-old dairy barn. The Federal Agents squeak by, and the Southern cousins are sent home. It seems rather fitting to get eliminated in a barn fill of manure, so even though they didn’t win the million, they should be grateful for their fitting send-off.

Are you watching The Amazing Race this season? Who would you like to see win?

Somewhere in our development, we get ideas in mind about certain countries in the world. It may be from a favorite restaurant in our hometown, a particularly hated language teacher or a lovable foreign pen pal, but one way or another, we’re attracted to visiting other countries in this huge world, whether we know anything solid about those places or not. Although I know very little about the majority of the countries I want to visit, here is my list of the places I want to see most before I die:

India. I’ve always wanted to visit India since I started becoming obsessed with Bollywood films in high school. Americans are very familiar with Indian people and cuisine, making India one of the fastest growing tourist destinations in the world. The country’s widespread knowledge of English makes locales like Mumbai and Delhi popular tourist attractions, but the extreme divide between the rich and the poor makes for extreme culture shock for many western tourists.

Japan. Another country that is incredibly romanticized in the United States, Japan promises to be a land of high modernity, of well-organized streets and quick innovation. I’m particularly interested in visiting because of the cutesy little gadget that every Japanese person is supposed to keep in his or her apartment. Also, most Americans are quite familiar with Japanese cuisine, and want to try it at its freshest source. Certainly, tourists will be surprised by extremely-expensive Tokyo, and should remember that Japan is still rebuilding after last year’s tsunami.

Switzerland. Switzerland is another one of those dream countries, where the streets are clean, the mountains are within view, the beer runs like streams, the people speak perfect English, and everyone wears really fashionable glasses. Did I just drool a bit? I’m sure that Switzerland isn’t that perfect (at least I hope it isn’t that perfect), but it still seems, perhaps after Italy, like every American’s ideal vacation. Zurich is quite expensive, but what wouldn’t you pay to visit paradise temporarily.

Thailand. Thailand is supposed to be a land of white sandy beaches, blue waters, and rustic thatched huts that sit right on the water. I don’t know if any of it true—pictures aren’t usually to be believed—but Thailand is the tropical paradise that most westerners seem to want to visit. Bangkok is always a busy city, but now the city sits in disrepair from the October floods and political turmoil because of the government’s handling of this natural disaster.

Where are the countries you would most like to visit?

I am currently teaching in China. Since I’ve just arrived, I’m currently overwhelmed by the culture, the language barrier and the constant rush of new smells, sights, sounds and people.

One of the aspects of China about which I was most excited has proven not to disappoint. Street food is ubiquitous, unusual and, best of all, delicious. Since I don’t know the names of these delicacies—and most of the other foreigners in China don’t seem to know their names, either—I’ll discuss the tasty components of some of the best street foods I’ve eaten so far.

A Chinese burrito made of a piece of oily bread filled with an egg, green onion, chili flakes, lettuce and diced potato. This is probably the most addicting foodstuff that I’ve had to eat in China so far. Filled with the above-mentioned ingredients which are then painted with a garlicky sauce the consistency of vinaigrette, the result is a sort of Indian Paratha-type bread filled with fresh veggies and thin-cut home fries. Best of all, the cost of the vegetarian version is about 45 cents.

Various meats, vegetables and bread grilled outside. The simplicity of this concept is probably what makes it so delicious. Diners chose raw meats, including sea foods like octopus and squid, as well as pork and chicken, and vegetables, including mushrooms and long-stemmed green onions. Whatever you choose is grilled over an open fire and served with a piece of flatbread that has also been grilled. Order a huge bottle of beer with very little alcohol and eat under the tarp provided. A cheap meal, as well, costing about $3 if you eat with friends.

Tofu with the consistency and taste of pork grilled over an open flame and painted liberally with a spicy chili sauce. Tofu replaces meat all over the country, and while it’s better than the slimy excuse we see in quite a bit of Americanized Asian foods, I’m still not its biggest fan. Try the real thing instead, if you’re carnivorously-inclined.

A Chinese crepe filled with a hot dog, garlic salt, egg, chives, sauce and chili flakes. I was surprised to see that China prepared a vessel for its sandwich pockets that was similar to the French crepe. Prepared on the same hot metal circular disk as used in Paris, the thin dough shell makes a perfectly crispy holder for filling. We were a little squeamish about the raw chicken filling option, but there is also a vegetarian or hot dog choice. Apparently, the Chinese have adopted the all-American hot dog wholeheartedly.

Have you had Chinese street food? What are your must-tries?